Ka Lai Brightley-Hodges, Head of Membership and Marketing at PACEY
I’ve always really struggled to switch off after work on a Friday, even more so now I work from home. Unless I’ve got big plans to go out that evening, I never really get settled into the weekend until I wake up on Saturday morning. Before I know it though, it’s Sunday afternoon I’m in the kitchen prepping a huge Sunday lunch (that my partner said I didn’t need to do but I insisted on doing it anyway) and at the same time I’m worrying about the amount of work I need to get through the next day, making mental lists to try to manage it all and even consider working for a few hours that evening just got get on top of things. In fact, as I write this, I already know that I’ve set aside some time this Sunday to do a bit of work. It was only recently that I found out there was a name for this. The ‘Sunday Scaries’.
The ‘Sunday scaries’ refer to anxiety or dread about returning to work on Monday. In some cases, it can overlap with conditions such as an anxiety disorder or major depression. 7 in 10 Brits (67%) report regularly experiencing them increasing to three-quarters (74%) for those aged 18 to 24.
Symptoms include:
- A sense of dread or doom
- Resentment or anger
- An upset stomach
- Difficulty sleeping
- Headaches
- Restlessness
- Irritability
- A sense of unease
- Intrusive and unwanted thoughts about the upcoming week that you can’t shake
I’ve been in jobs where I’ve absolutely dreaded going to work on Monday morning because the boss was so volatile that you didn’t know what kind of situation you were walking into, or the culture of the company was so toxic people are leaving daily and you end up with everyone else’s workload. That’s the ‘Sunday scaries’. However, I’ve also been in roles that I absolutely love and because of that I take on way too much work and set myself unrealistic expectations so that come Sundays, I’m sitting there thinking ‘how on earth am I going to get all this work done?’. That’s also the ‘Sunday scaries’.
How do we usually deal with ‘Sunday Scaries’?
The Office for Health Improvement and Disparities (OHID) says ‘The ‘Sunday Scaries’ are shown to peak just after 5pm for many as thoughts and worries turn to the week ahead; with Google searches around sadness spiking on a Sunday as people turn to the internet for help. Searches for ‘trouble sleeping’ also peak on a Monday, reflecting the nation’s struggle to unwind as the weekend draws to a close’.
They found that to distract themselves from the ‘Sunday Scaries’ young people aged 18 to 24 are most likely to scroll on social media, whereas those aged 25 to 32 are most likely to binge watch TV and those aged 33 to 40 are most likely to comfort eat.
So, what’s being done to help people?
OHID who are responsible for improving national public health has unveiled a new campaign urging people to “be kind to your mind”. They say that by answering five simple questions through the every mind matters website, people can get a personalised “mind plan” giving them tips to help deal with stress and anxiety, boost their mood, sleep better and feel more in control.
Headspace, a mindful meditation company with a mission to improve the health and happiness of the world, advise a regular meditation practice helps us build awareness and resilience so we don’t get so stuck in thoughts and once we’re able to notice those creeping thoughts we can choose to acknowledge the thought clearly, calmly, and compassionately. We see what the mind is doing, and we choose to step away from it. Their mini meditation video on ‘Sunday Scaries’ shows you just how to get started.
We spoke to Lucy Lewin, Founder of The Profitable Nursery Academy and PACEY Trustee who had some great practical advice for Practitioners:
You know that sinking Sunday feeling, right? You’re supposed to be in full-on relaxation mode, but then the phone rings. It’s a well-meaning team member letting you know they can’t make it into work tomorrow. Suddenly, your peaceful Sunday is replaced with sleepless Sunday night stress. All you can think about are staffing ratios, deployment, and the myriad tasks for Monday. Trust me, I’ve been there!
So, here’s what I did to flip this around and reclaim my Sundays.
I made a simple yet game-changing tweak to our process. Our setting opens at 7:30 am, and we have staff on-site from 7:15 am to perform the opening checks and make the final preparations. We need at least two team members for this.
Enter the ‘Absence Rota’ – my sanity-saving brainwave! Each week, we designate people to be on standby in case either of our early starters can’t make it. If they can’t, they call the person on standby at an agreed time.
Here’s the beautiful part: team members no longer need to call me on a Sunday. Instead, they ring the setting no less than 30 minutes before their shift starts if they can’t attend, as per our policy. And yes, it took a bit of reinforcement from my end to make sure everyone was on board and understood this wasn’t about me being unreachable or indifferent. Quite the opposite!
I was leading by example. I was showing my team that their wellbeing mattered and that I needed to look after my own wellbeing too. It’s like they say on airplanes, isn’t it? You have to put on your own oxygen mask before you can help others.
And let’s not forget the Friday routine. I wind up my to-do list and make my ‘must-achieve’ list for the coming week. When Monday rolls around, I’m all set to hit the ground running, fully refreshed and ready to go.
So, there you have it! A stress-free Sunday leads to a motivated Monday. And, who knows? You might just start looking forward to Mondays!
Think about what approach will help you to beat the ‘Sunday Scaries’
There are other ways too. A friend of mine once told me that every Sunday night as a way to appreciate what’s been achieved that week and decompress ready for work the next day without actually having to think about work, she would write a very comical diary about her family’s activities that week from the point of view of her very disapproving, elderly neighbour. At the time I thought she was absolutely bonkers, but now I’m starting to come around to the idea, something light-hearted and fun if I don’t have the quiet space around me needed to meditate.
This blog was written by Ka Lai Brightley-Hodges, PACEY’s Head of Membership and Marketing with a contribution from Lucy Lewin, PACEY Trustee and Founder of The Profitable Nursery Academy
